Kim Jong-Il will auction nukes on eBay this Friday

Pyongyang (September 19, 2005) – The North-Korean government announced today that it would auction its nuclear weapons on eBay starting this Friday. This came as the major consequence of the agreement reached early today in the six-nation talk in which North Korea pledged to dismantle its nuclear weapons program. Mr. Kim Jong-Il, the North Korean leader, said an assortment of six nukes ranging from one kiloton to twenty kilotons will be offered on eBay starting at 0:15 AM Central Standard Time on Friday, September 23. Each nuke will have a unique “authenticity certificate” signed by the Pakistani Chief Nuclear Scientist Dr. AQ Khan, who oversaw the design and construction of these weapons. Mr. Kim Jong-Il also said that the North Korean government would provide free overnight FedEx shipping and unlimited lifetime warranty.